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AbleismHear me, Understand me, Support me: What young women want you to know about depressionIn this section:
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My parents were not able to handle my feelings, especially sadness and anger. An only child and the only physically disabled member in my family, I lacked a safe, nurturing, affectionate adult who could validate my feelings and experiences. My parents, like many disabled people's parents, were trying so hard to give me as "normal" an upbringing as possible that my disability ended up consuming me. Consequently, I withdrew at the age of three. I created my "real" life in my head and developed excellent dissociating skills . . . I lived there so much, I would confuse it for reality at times. Prior to finding my present therapist, I tried a few others. They both had issues with my physical disability. One of them was lesbian and able-bodied. It did not work out with her because on my first visit with her, she started the session by asking me, "So, what is your problem?" When I began sharing what I wanted to work on, she stopped me and asked it again, looking at my wheelchair. I remember not believing she was really asking that, since I assumed at the time all therapists, especially a lesbian therapist, would not have issues with a client who had a disability. The other therapist had a physical disability and was heterosexual. It did not work out with her because our sessions felt like peer counselling, with her sharing her experiences. I needed "real" therapy . . . the bottom line is [the therapist] must to be able to see her client for what she is - a whole person. Disabilities, invisible or visible, have been redefined in the disabilities studies field as impairments that can have effects on the level and quality of activities that individuals can pursue. Since the 1970s, people with disabilities, and allies, have worked to explain their reality, based on the idea that it is not the actual impairment that limits a person's interaction in the world, but the barriers, both physical and attitudinal, that society constructs around impairments. Academics refer to ideas that support this thinking as the social model of disability. The quotes above poignantly show societal barriers facing young women with impairments. These challenges may include physical barriers as well as struggles with parents, siblings, friends or helping professionals who feel sorry for a young woman with a disability. Being the "receptacle" of others' emotions can have negative effects on self-esteem. Gender-role stereotypes of women as caregivers may lead a young woman with a disability to want to help others cope with her impairments, but clearly this is not her responsibility. She also may feel she is a disappointment or a burden to her family. Invisible disabilities present similar and additional challenges. Some young women may try to minimize or hide their impairments from others. Diabetes, with its schedule of needles, blood tests and regular snacks, can be an embarrassing regime to uphold, especially at an age when spontaneity is greatly valued. Concern over potential low blood sugar while drinking or partying may discourage a young woman from going out, or may cause conflict with parents who want her to stay home. Having a hearing impairment or a learning disability can lead to feelings of being different or "damaged." Lack of control over circumstances can affect a young woman's feelings about herself and her ability to fully participate in life. This can lead to feeling disempowered and helpless, placing young women at a greater risk for experiencing depression. No young woman should be or can be viewed as one-dimensional. The layering of identities, histories and experiences that each young woman has makes her unique, and a disability is just one aspect of a young woman's life. Don't assume that she has chosen it as her defining identity. We can work with young women to help them identify their intrinsic strengths and move forward in ways that will build their self-esteem. We can also improve our ability to support young women by focusing on ourselves and our services - by checking assumptions, prejudice or discrimination in our own attitudes and behaviours, and actively removing barriers in our environments. In addition, acknowledging that ableism - systemic discrimination against people with visible and invisible disabilities - exists at all levels of society may connect young women to an analysis that can be a potent source of strength and healing. Service providers can watch out for ableist thinking and offer alternative ideas and resources to strengthen young women's self-esteem. Encourage young women to explore their strengths and abilities and to build on them. For example, if a young woman identifies that she likes talking to people, encourage her to develop and enhance that skill either through volunteer work or by joining a public speaking association such as Toastmasters. Explore the young woman's social networks and how she can expand social supports for her interests and, if she's interested, her disability. Provide appropriately formatted information (e.g., Braille, audiotape, large print materials, etc.) as well as American Sign Language interpreters for young women who are deaf, deafened or hard of hearing, to ensure proper understanding of their needs. Connecting with advocacy and education groups around disabilities may be a source of strength for young women. A good place to start in Ontario is the Disabled Women's Network (DAWN) (http://dawn.thot.net/) or Disabled People International (http://www.dpi.org). Young women and girls with disabilities are more at risk of violence in their lives. DAWN has created a video and educational guide to raise awareness for young women and girls. Order at http://dawn.thot.net/literature.html#video. Educate yourself about disability-related issues. Canadian statistics offered through the Disabled Women's Network Fact Sheet on disabled women (http://dawn.thot.net/fact.html) provide key insights:
Additional helpful resources include: Barnes, C., Mercer, G. & Shakespeare, T. (1999). Exploring Disability: A Sociological Introduction. Cambridge: Polity Press. Farwett, B. (2000). Feminist Perspectives on Disability. New York: Pearson Education Ltd. Feldman, W. (2000). Learning Disorders: A Guide for Parents and Teachers. Richmond Hill, ON: Firefly Books. Ferri, B.A. & Gregg N. (1998). "Women with disabilities: Missing voices." Women's Studies International Forum, 21 (4), 429-439. Kaufman, M. (1995). Easy for You to Say: Q & As for Teens Living with Chronic Illness or Disability. Richmond Hill, ON: Firefly Books. For more information, see the following web sites: Accessibility Ontario Canadian Abilities Foundation Canadian Standards Association Center for Young Women's Health, Children's Hospital Boston Directory for Accessibility Disability and Technology: A Resource Collection World Enable Canadian Diabetes Association - Teen Spirit: The Young, the Restless and Diabetes American Diabetes Association |
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Last updated: Dec 13, 2006 4:13 PM Published: Feb 10, 2012 6:30 PM ID#P24662 |