Session 3 - Miracle Question

Brief Couples Therapy: Group and Individual Couple Treatment for Addiction and Related Mental Health Concerns

For this session:

Session Guidelines
- Objectives
- Checklist
Session Resources
- Materials
- Summary
- Tips for Individual Couple Session
Client Handouts
- Goal Assignment 1
Progress Note

Session Guidelines

Objectives

Couples will begin to:

identify any positive small changes within their relationship
focus on the future and form a vision of how they would like the relationship to be
focus on reasonable and achievable goals that will bring them closer to their vision.

Checklist

Guidelines for the counsellor with tips on what to do with or say to the client.

Check-in

Ask about issues arising from the last session.

“Name a thought, word or feeling that describes how you are right now.”
Stating the Format and Purpose of This Session

“By reviewing the miracles that you’ve written down, we hope to help you formulate a vision of how you would like your relationship to be, and communicate this to your partner and the group.”
Reviewing Miracle Question Homework

Ask couples to discuss their miracles. They may need help keeping the focus of the discussion on themselves, rather than their partners, and on concrete changes.

Encourage concrete, specific and behavioural answers; specifically, ask them what would they be doing differently and not how they would be feeling different. Therapists should listen for small, concrete expressions (e.g., we would kiss each other goodbye when we leave for work).

Ask people if any part of their miracle is already happening, and if so, what is that like?
Homework (Goal Assignment 1)

Couples are instructed to complete the Goal Assignment 1 sheet for discussion in the next session.

Couples will individually select a personal goal and a couple goal from their miracle, and write down the steps needed to achieve that goal.

Therapists should encourage positive, action-oriented goals (e.g., “talk twice a week” versus “argue less”) and give clients examples of individual goals (e.g., “I want to handle problems more calmly”) and couple goals (e.g., “we will go for a walk together once a week”). Instruct them to be specific in identifying steps that will help them move towards their goal.
Check-out

Ask each group member to offer one positive word, thought or message that he or she got out of the session.

Session Resources

Materials

pens and copies of Miracle Question exercise
homework sheets: Goal Assignment 1

Summary

Check-in
- Ask about comments or issues arising from the last session.
- Ask participants to express a thought, word or feeling.
Stating the Format and Purpose of This Session
- Miracle Question
Reviewing Miracle Question Homework
- Ask couples to discuss their miracles.
- Encourage clients to focus on themselves and to be concrete and specific.
- There are no right or wrong answers — couples may interpret the “miracle” differently.
Homework (Goal Assignment 1)
- Describe the purpose of Goal Assignment 1.
- Explain how. Give examples. Remind clients to think of steps towards goals.
- Hand out packages.
Check-out

Tips for Individual Couple Session 3

During the session, it is important to stress to clients that their miracle should be specific, concrete, behavioural and about themselves, not their partner. Redirect clients to focus on the concrete, behavioural elements of the miracle if they get sidetracked.
Because there is more time than in the group format, therapists should ensure that partners have heard and understood each other’s miracle. Use this time also to clarify and explore what each would be doing differently.

Brief Couples Therapy

Acknowledgments

Introduction

References

Appendix A: The Background of the Integrative Model