Alone In Canada - Building a new identity
"I was a lawyer back home and I had a good life. We lived in a large house, with servants to help with the children and the
housework. I had my own Mercedes. Now in Canada we live in a bad apartment and I drive a second-hand car. The only work that
I can get is as a counsellor in a women's shelter. Nobody believes me when I tell them that I used to be a lawyer." - Esi,
from Ghana
Immigration can give you a fresh start in life. This can be both positive and negative. On the positive side, there are parts
of your identity that will stay with you no matter where you live in the world. On the negative side, many of the things that
made you feel like a whole person are gone now and must be replaced by something else.
Successful newcomers find a place between their old and their new identities. This takes time. It is important to hold on
to the qualities that you value in your old identity, while opening yourself to challenges that will help you to form a new
identity. This process may continue for the rest of your life.
As one newcomer said, "in my country there was no work and no hope for me. Here I am still struggling but I feel better about
it. I am more confident because I am safe. I am used to being alone now, and I like it. My family in Turkey doesn't understand
this. They think that something is wrong."
When you return to your homeland for a visit, you may find that you have changed, and may even feel uncomfortable. Back in
Canada, you may feel lost as well. You are suspended between two worlds. This can be painful. It is also a normal part of
adjusting to life in a new country.
Exercise
This exercise may help you to see the links between your old and your new identities.
1. Five things about me that I do not want to change, no matter where I live, are:
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2. Three things about me that have changed since coming to Canada are:
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3. Three links between my old and new identities are:
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Centre for Addiction
